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Here’s another Actual Play write-up from Woody at FAST. This one tells the tale of Colin’s HappilyEverAfter game at Archon 2010.
(As told by Ms. Muffet)
It was just another day in HappilyEverAfter, the city that puts the “sin” in fascination. You could survive if you knew how to play the game; the penalty for not following the rules could result in the kind of dirt nap you don’t wake up from. I’m Ms. Muffet, owner of Twisted Web, Inc., a small detective agency that has a reputation for getting results when you don’t want the buttons involved. I retain a few unique freelancers to keep the overhead low; they work for cash under the table and I save a fist full of dough on health insurance. Like them, I am not without my own curious abilities that come in handy in my line of work. Several years ago when I was just a wee lass, a radioactive spider sat beside me and bit my hand. Too bad I deep-sixed it before I discovered I had gained wall-crawling and web-slinging powers. (The little buggers still give me the heebie-jeebies, though.)
So anyway, I was in the middle of an important case of the mystery of the missing scotch bottle, when this classy skirt wandered into my office. And it wasn’t just any dame, either, but Cinderella herself! You remember her, right? Got hitched to Prince Charming awhile back. It seemed her glass slippers were missing and she wanted them found fast and discreetly. Cinderella was in dutch and had a big social event coming up; she needed those slippers. Obviously, she said money was no object (my favorite kind of client) and I told her I’d put my best gumshoes on it and I would oversee the investigation personally. Cinderella suspected Snow White, Charming’s ex-wife. I had my doubts… too obvious… but we’d keep her in the mix. I assembled the team:
- Peter Pan- Juvenile Delinquent, the best hired muscle money could buy. He had high friends in low places.
- Malificent- Evil Queen, a little bitchy from time to time but her magic got the job done.
- Tortoise- Meat Shield, honestly, I don’t know how he started working for me. I think he just showed up one day and I had him wax my crate. He was slow as Christmas but could take a lot of punishment.
- Big Bad Wolf- Tracker, his keen senses made finding those who don’t want to be found easy. Worth his weight in Dog Chow.
- Capt. Hook- Vicious and has underworld connections. Originally, I was concerned having him and Pan together but nothing says let bygones be bygones like cold, hard cabbage.
- Goldilocks- Burglar/Con Artist, she can get into hard to enter places.
- Cheshire Cat- Guide, his invisible surveillance has been a case-breaker many times.
I took Tortoise, Wolf and Goldilocks with me to the crime scene to investigate. We found the mansion well secured. On the release panel of the hidden slipper compartment, I used cigarette ash to dust for fingerprints (and found a woman-sized gloved hand). I noted that Charming had been sleeping in a separate bedroom. Hmmm. Security cameras revealed a black blur outside and glass being broken. Whoever she was, she was a master thief and a quick one at that. I found a broken frame with a photo of Cinderella hugging Jack (a well-known ladies man and all around cad). The new question was “Who was seeing Jack and is now jealous of Cinderella?” We learned that for a long time Charming was very devoted to Cinderella while she was always running around on him. Since he was known for his own party lifestyle, we wondered what kind of powerful charm could have turned him into Mr. Fidelity?
Mal and Hook went to talk to Snow White’s stepmother, the Evil Queen (How many “evil queens” are there around here?). They tried to use the Magic Mirror to find out about who took the slippers but the answer was magically shielded (very powerful barrier!).
Pan and Cat contacted Peter’s sources to see what the word on the street was. They found Bernie, the cobbler elf, had received a call on the horn from someone with a muffled female voice about fencing the slippers. He didn’t want to get involved with such hot merchandise; no hockshop would. He also told Pan and Wolf the wearer of the slippers could make whoever they wanted fall in love with her. Pan traced the call from a phone booth on 22nd Street (bad part of town; lousy with greasers and grifters!); they go there and Wolf gets a woman’s scent.
The team met to share information and plot our next move. Goldilocks remembered Jill used to be Jack’s partner in crime. They were master thieves, although Jill was clearly the brains of the operation and had just shot up on our list to be Suspect Numero Uno! We also found out Jill was back in town, living in a dive near 22nd Street. Both Pan and Hook put the word out that they could move stolen merchandise; we were going to see if the elusive Jill would come to us and get caught in our web.
While we were waiting, Malificent and Hook (I warned them not to share too much information) visited Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother and ended up blabbing the whole story. They did learn that the Fairy Godmother couldn’t pinpoint the location of the slippers but they were in the vicinity of 20th and 26th Streets. Also, she thought a thief with an invisibility cloak could hide the slippers. The slippers could be worn by someone else and have the same magical properties.
Meanwhile I had Cat tailing Cinderella and Wolf keeping an eye on Jack. As suspected, Cinderella, in disguise, went to Jack’s place and they proceeded to do the horizontal mambo. What a little slut! Eavesdropping, we find out Jill had approached Jack earlier to try to charm him (but apparently, his over inflated ego wouldn’t allow it). He really was a selfish little bastard. The skinny was after she failed to get Jack back, Jill was stuck with hot slippers and needed to unload them and get out of Dodge. We were hitting on all eight when she contacted Pan to exchange the footwear for a cool one and a half million clams. They arranged to meet at the Acme warehouse on 47th. Pan was to come alone but Goldilocks went along since she knew Jill. We had the joint covered from the outside; I crawled up to the ceiling and set a web trap.
Eventually, Jill with her invisibility cloak and glass slippers showed up and the deal with Pan went off without a hitch. When she turned to take a powder, I snagged her cloak with a web line. She panicked and whipped out a heater; the sister was ready to throw lead. As I lowered myself down to talk dame to dame and put her fears to rest. I didn’t want to send her to the big house… I wanted to hire her! I told Jill a smart dish like her could do a lot better than to be stuck carrying a torch for a rotten egg like Jack. Jill said she didn’t want to stay in town, to which I replied I wanted to open an office of Twisted Web, Inc., on the east coast and could use someone with her talents to head it up. Naturally, I returned her cloak and gave her my card; she said she’d give me a call.
The next day, we met with Cinderella and returned her glass slippers, along with the bill, plus expenses. She wanted to know who the culprit was but I told her I promised the thief anonymity. I didn’t think she’d mind since she now had her slippers (and Prince Charming) back. After all, it was just the price of doing business in HappilyEverAfter.
Cast:
QAGS GM- Colin Thomas
Ms. Muffet- Woody
Peter Pan- Larry
Malificent- Laurie
Tortoise- James
Big Bad Wolf- Jeffery
Capt. Hook- Mike
Goldilocks- Amy
Cheshire Cat- Matt
